Friday, July 11, 2025

A Lost Landscape


A landscape to explore.

One day I had a terrible headache and back pain. I spent most of the day sleeping with a heating pad across my forehead and ibuprofen in my gut. Finally, by late evening, my headache had subsided and, after another pill, my back was manageable. Now the only problem was that after a day of sleep, I hardly felt the need for it. It’s not uncommon for our cat Nero to bother us at night, either to feed him or just to get our attention. This particular night he was particularly bothersome, as he lurked around the bedroom trying to wake us. I wasn’t asleep, and I felt a kinship then with our nocturnal friend. At some point, Nero sat at the foot of the bed and stared at me. I looked up from my book and thought, “Hey bud, it’s you and me against the night.”

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Friday, April 11, 2025

Everything’s Computer!


In the future, everything's Computer! Even kitchen and breakfast.

“Everything’s Computer!”, so said the mad king sitting in a plastic chariot.
Microwave ovens? Computer!
Broadcast television? Computer!
Electric cars? Computer!
Social media? Computer!!
The Internet? That’s Computerrr!!
AI? You better believe that’s nuthin’ but Compooter!!
Everything’s Computer!

Remember when we thought putting Computer in everything would make everything work better all the time? Remember when we thought connecting everything Computer (which at this point might as well be everything) to the Internet (which is computer!) and it would make our fridges smart enough to help us drink fresher milk? Now we’re going to put AI inside Computer which is inside everything and is connected to everything else and it won’t cause any harm at all.

Like it wouldn’t suddenly take over the power grid and turn off all the traffic lights at night to save money. It wouldn’t raise the temperature in refrigerators to spoil all our food to raise food sellers’ profits. It wouldn’t call you randomly and ask for $10,000 in bail money for the release of your nephew in the voice of your nephew. It wouldn’t scam your grandmother. It wouldn’t funnel money from the treasury and invest in bitcoin to fund a series of coups in the Balkan states. I’m absolutely sure it wouldn’t transpose the names of Estonia and Lithuania on every published map as an unsanctioned improvised defense strategy. It wouldn’t rename The Gulf of Mexico to Gulf of America then to Big Gulf of Water brought to you by Taco Bell, then rename it The Pepsi Halftime Gulf Brought to you in partnership with Verizon. It wouldn’t invent a new kind of porn that blends seafood with anime and broadcast it to screens, large and small, across the planet (OK, I’ve just been told it’s already done that). It wouldn’t spread disinformation to destabilize economies. It certainly wouldn’t take your job by making you redundant.

Well, it might do that.
Actually, there’s a good chance it will.
In fact, there is a 97.9% chance it has already happened.

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Sunday, January 26, 2025

Contrarian Grammarian


Edison's electric pen.

For the last year or more I've been using AI driven grammar bots to help me improve my writing. All I really wanted was something to fix typos, correct comma usage, or guide me when I accidentally change point of view or tenses. Most of the corrections suggested by such AI agents at Grammarly or Evernote are helpful. Actually not Evernote. Evernote is an application whose AI is so dim as to offer "Amurican" spellings despite having set my dictionary choices as "Canadian English". While the application allows words like "labour" and "colour", the bot automatically suggests "labor" and "color" and makes such changes without consulting me at all. If I were an editor and Evernote was my assistant, they'd be gone. Eighty-sixed. Dismissed. Fired. Given a dishonourable discharge.

One thing that has always bothered me about spell-checkers and grammar assistants is how they insist that everyone write the same way. It's very difficult to write in an almost casual informal tone with these pearl-clutching old biddies telling you that what you are writing simply isn’t said in polite society. If I had wanted Ms. Gillingham from my seventh grade English class to write my post, I would've gone through the trouble to dig her up and re-animate the old soul, Frankenstein style. But I didn't and I won't, because that kind of thing isn’t done in polite society.

I remember a David Foster Wallace essay, Tense Present, referencing SWE, or standard written English (or as it was sometimes referred to as Standard White English), and making the case to his class about how they should approach their essay writing. I may be misremembering it, but his point was more about aiming to write this way at college as that is how you will be judged. When writing creatively for yourself or your audience, there are plenty of arguments to abandon that style. I use the word, "style", loosely here because there's still a case for grammatical correctness. It's also important to at least be consistent in how you use punctuation, quotations and the like for clarity. Yet, (there's an even a reason I use "yet" rather than "but" to begin a sentence, but I digress) if you want to sound loose, conversational or natural in text, I'm not sure being grammatically correct is always necessary. It's also true what we say in spoken terms, can be unclear in written text. My point is that if you want to convey a story or idea in your own voice or style, then these AI grammar agents are not here to help you, but hinder you. Knowing how these AI agents are "trained" by being fed reams and reams of existing text, it's not surprising they seek to make any one person's writing sound like everybody else's.

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Friday, January 17, 2025

100 Minutes of solitude would be nice.

I'm not talking about one hundred years of solitude here, but a few hours of solitude would be nice.
"Take a moment to reflect in your journal."

"Don’t miss out on Skip deals this week."

"Our Black Friday sales can’t be beat!"

"Design Reviews. Invitation from…"

"Tap to save on food, time and money all December."

"Collection Day
Remember to take out your blue bin today."

"Payment made to Skyway Canada"

"Save on something you’ll love."

"Let Chris know about your workout."

"Your CRA refund of $512 is waiting…"

Get out of my pocket Tim Cook. I know you’re in there! Scurrying around to find every last crumb of data and money in my posession! I know it's that time of year when I'm getting far more promotional texts along with scams, but this year, somehow, I've let the notifications get out of control. I think it might be killing me a little. Because I wear a smartwatch that is paired to my mobile, I get the same notifications twice. Initially my phone, in silent mode, will buzz, followed shortly by my watch buzzing. This is a problem and I've begun the tedious task of turning off notices from most applications and unsubscribing to as many mailing lists as possible. You can easily turn off all notifications of course, but I do want and need some. If this phone knew me as well as it purports to advertisers, then it should know when I would like to be left alone.
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Saturday, April 13, 2024

The Dissolution of Dreams 


The Piranesian rec room of my dreams.

I've never been someone for whom sleep comes easily, though I'm not an insomniac either. Once I get to sleep, I'm fine. My natural rhythm, discovered years ago at university, is to fall asleep somewhere between 1 AM and 2 AM and wake around 8:30 - 9 AM. I imagine I get about 6 to 6-1/2 hours of sleep and I know that more than 8 hours of sleep can lead directly to a headache. A bit less sleep leaves me feeling drugged by the afternoon and the only cure is a nap. Too much sleep can lead to a migraine. The only reason I can see this being called "unhealthy" is because it doesn't fit within societal norms.

The other night, I was uncomfortable due to back pain, so I took an over-the-counter muscle relaxant that I know also happens to make me drowsy so I usually wait until bedtime to assess whether I'll take it or not. As I usually wake up with an alarm, I don't often remember my dreams. I think in general, you tend to remember dreams if you awaken either during or just after you were in REM sleep, so you're more susceptible to remembering dreams when you wake up naturally. For me, it's typical to remember my dreams on Saturdays or Sundays when I sleep in.

On this particular night, I had a weirdly detailed dream of staying at a friend's house and finding a doorway that led down to an immense underground concourse full of stairways, landings, rooms, and levels that were open to a very high glass ceiling. Imagine a space similar to a shopping mall that is open and looks down to lower levels. There were many spaces, all in some 1970s style of concrete and rust-coloured carpeting that were full of people doing various things like playing foosball or ping-pong, relaxing with a drink, watching TV or with older people gathered together doing crafts or even one "room" of older women grooming their enormous cats. I eventually found my way back up to my friend's house and when he asked where I'd been I asked him about this enormous (and surprisingly bright) Piranesian space. He answered matter of factly that all the homes in the neighbourhood shared this communal basement, like a big shared rec room and that I was just seeing his neighbours who all live nearby.
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Monday, August 27, 2018

Dr. Stephen Hawking has some questions while aboard the Millennium Falcon 


Stephen Hawking demonstrating what gravity looks like when there isn't any. Image via Le Devoir

I'm sure we all remember Dr. Stephen Hawking's various appearances before a live audience or on programs such as the Simpsons, but do you remember his Star Wars cameo?



Hans Solo:
Welcome aboard Doc!

Stephen Hawking:
Thank you, Mr. Solo or should I call you Captain, or Han or…

Hans Solo:
This is the fastest ship in the galaxy you know, made the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs.

Stephen Hawking:
Oh? How fast was that?

Hans Solo:
Fast enough for you, old man!

Stephen Hawking:
But a parsec is a unit of distance, not time…

Hans Solo:
Exactly!

Stephen Hawking:
Well, that's confusing? Tell me, can you explain to me how gravity is achieved on this vessel?

Hans Solo:
Empire cruisers! Hang on, this might get rough!

Empire cruisers open fire on the Falcon, which sustains a direct hit.

Stephen Hawking:
But wait? If "blasters" (whatever they are), are striking this craft why aren't we pushed away from the point of impact? Come to think of it, why aren't the Empire's cruisers also pushed away in the opposite direction. That is to say the conservation of…

Hans Solo:
The shields can't take much more of this!

Stephen Hawking:
Yes - about the “shields”…

Hans Solo:
Punch it, Chewie!


Stephen Hawking:
Wait? Are we moving at the speed of light?

Hans Solo:
Hyperdrive, baby! We'll be home soon enough.

Stephen Hawking:
How is this possible? Look, back at the cantina, how were so many species able to breathe the same atmosphere? How can so many life-supporting planets be so close to each other? And planets of such different sizes that apparently have the same climate planet-wide not to mention they seem to have roughly the same gravity?

Hans Solo:
You ask a lotta questions, Doc!

Stephen Hawking:
How are there heavier-than-air craft that can defy gravity without wings or without the necessary thrust to create lift yet can enter and exit the atmosphere easily? And how, in a place without schools do so many people know how to build and maintain bi-pedal androids with significant artificial intelligence? Or why would shooting the keypad of a locked door open it? That would be like unlocking a front door by shooting the door bell.

Hans Solo:
Look, Doc, I don’t have time for this.

Stephen Hawking:
Does this entire galaxy run on suspension of disbelief?

Cue theme music, then use every conceivable screen wipe effect at once.

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Wednesday, May 30, 2018

unbound 

Image from page 150 of "The Canadian field-naturalist" (1924)

I hate my backpack. I hate all backpacks. I even hate the name. Back. Pack. I hate this entire category of luggage. There was a moment when I thought what a great idea a “No-strap Backback” was, until I realized it was a terrible idea that was also an April Fools prank. Even the most ergonomically designed pack is putting stress on your shoulders and spine (even “strapless” ones). I hate the sweatiness of a pack covering a large portion of my back. What’s the point of wearing breathable fabric outerwear if most of it is covered with a heavy nylon unbreathable pack stuffed with junk?

Of course, it’s not really about the bag itself. Living in a city where you leave your house for hours at a time and don’t have a car to secure personal affects means you have to carry everything you might need with you. I’m fascinated by the “Persona” project where an artist asks to photograph a person and the belongings they deem essential enough to carry with them everyday (a surprising number of people carry two phones and knives - big knives?!) If I emptied out my backpack you’d find an asthma inhaler, a handful of ibuprofen, maybe a protein bar, a couple of notebooks, multiple pens, a phone cable and a backup battery to recharge my phone on the go. Probably the oddest things I carry are part of a repair kit for my bike, namely a wrench and a pump (a compact pump but a pump nonetheless).
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Thursday, January 25, 2018

The Hibernator's Handbook 


This is exactly the kind of thing I want to avoid

2017 didn’t end well for me. In fact, I began the holiday season looking up from my belly and ended the year looking down at it. Less than a week before Christmas, I was riding hard, standing on the pedals, when one of my bike’s crank arms gave way beneath me. Luckily, my ribs broke my fall. I spent the entirety of Christmas trying not to move, but now more than anything I have to try to move which is a tricky business when I’ve decided under no circumstances should I go outside.

Having no bike to ride as transport and with the temperatures well in the crispy -20 to -30s I began to feel a hibernation coming on. If bears and other beasties can do it, why can’t I? I’m old enough to not be drawn out by any kind “cold shaming” that accuses you of not being Canadian if you can’t face the cold. I have nothing to prove. I recently rode a bike 30 minutes across town in -23°C just to go skating for another 30 minutes then ride another 30 minutes back again. Did I mention the temperature? Did I mention the blistering wind as violent as any shark attack? Did I mention the difficulty tying my skates after all my fingers had frozen then broken off? I ride throughout the winter devising stratagems and tactics such as doubling of socks and gloves while employing a variety of balaclavas, scarves and hats in such a combination that not even I know where my face begins or ends. No, I have nothing to prove and it now seems appropriate to withdraw from the world and enter a prolonged state of torpor.
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Wednesday, October 18, 2017

The End of Coincidence 

“Courage, it couldn't come at a worse time”

This morning I wanted to post a “Happy Diwali” image on behalf of the advocacy group I work with as a shout-out to Toronto's large South Asian community. An appropriate photo full of candles carefully placed looked interesting and when I selected it I was directed to the site for Getty Images. Scrolling down to see if there were other options I was shown not more images for the Indian festival, but images of trending topics. That’s when I saw an image of a young Gord Downie in performance with the caption, “Tragically Hip frontman, Gord Downie has died at the age of 53.”

“Oh. How strange?” I thought. Downie had been ill for some time and though his passing wasn’t unexpected it was still unsettling. Yet I was really curious as to how Downie’s death had “trended’ on a stock imagery site? Did the announcement of the musician’s death cause journalists to rush to their laptops, search their Getty Images account for Gord Downie thus causing that search to trend on the site? That seemed the likely answer, but still a weird way to hear the news.

It was a warm evening and I decided to take advantage of the weather and go for a run. At Dundas and Broadview a truck passed with the Tragically Hip’s “Courage” emanating from the driver side window. At that point I needed some courage to keep running and I wondered about the coincidence of hearing one of the band’s signature songs on the day of their lead singer’s death. Of course, it wasn’t a coincidence at all. Every radio currently playing in Toronto at that moment was probably playing any one of two dozen popular Hip songs in memoriam for the fallen frontman. In fact, after I got home and showered, I went to the kitchen to start supper and I turned on the radio and CBC was playing a special tribute to Downie, so I heard more of his songs. When I think of it, I recall when Elvis died and we were camping in Grand Falls, every radio from every campsite was playing nothing but Elvis tunes.

All of this made me think that seeing an image of Gord Downie or hearing his music at a certain time would never be a coincidence and in fact we may have reached the end of any such coincidences. After reading The Improbability Principle by David Hand, you start to understand that in this world, what seems improbable is surprisingly likely. When I see trending images in my browser, you’re seeing different ones. When I see ads on a news site, you see different ones. The scroll of posts on my Facebook page are uniquely tailored for me. All of this is because we are in the age of the algorithm. Our devices that we use daily aren’t just the most intimate objects we own — we hold them so close and caress them so often — but they are also cheating on us.
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Sunday, September 17, 2017

Modernity is Killing You 


An uncontacted tribe photographed from the air in the Brazilian Amazon.
“But at least dark chocolate is good for you. No it is not.”
Modernity is killing you, you know that right? I mean, let's go through the list:

Sitting too much is killing you, and not even exercise can stop it because our sedentary existence is taking up too much of our lives. It's shortening your life even while it pays for your lifestyle. It affects your circulation and breathing to a point where you may suffer from a condition referred to as "desk apnea" which can lead to serious heart conditions.

Standing too much is killing you. It's hurting your back, it's ruining your circulation, and even if you sit once in a while that's not enough because standing too much is killing you.
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Thursday, June 15, 2017

Re-Overthinking Design


Another new concept phone slated for the heap of disposable ideas, image via abduzeedo.com

There's just one problem with this concept of a Digital Detox Phone - who needs a phone? I don't. The biggest problem I have with Canadian service providers is they are giving away talk time and long distance minutes as if it means something to me, but it doesn't. I need data. Data drives everything I do on a mobile device. The cost of talk and long distance minutes has reached the point where having a landline is meaningless (it's been that way for years). I get no value from extra talk time. My primary use for my mobile device is everything but talking. I regularly call my mom. That's it. The only other calls I get are from telemarketers, who I then block.

So why even come up with a new concept for a flip phone as a way to "digitally detox"? I don't have a better or more personal or more magical connection with people by voice than by text. A redux of a pager would make more sense to me than redesigning a flip phone, mostly because you can still buy any number of small (smaller than this design), affordable flip phones. I realize that 3D rendering apps plus the Internet have become fertile ground for any number of concepts, which is great but the fact that sometimes these ideas (which again, are all fun and great and exploratory etc) get enough traction to be posted, and reposted and shared until they show up in my newsfeed shows a profound lack of critical thinking. Let me expand on this.
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Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Don't Lose Your Nerve 

After reading a brief article extolling the practice of reducing stress and increasing productivity by scheduling some quiet time, it occurred to me that I might benefit from some scheduled quiet time. I’m one of the millions of sad people who tend to eat their take-out lunch at their desks. Usually I click through a few videos or simply keep working. Lately, since the time change (end of daylight savings? Beginning of daylight savings?) I’ve found myself caught off guard by looking at my watch to find I’ve been in the office until the ugly hour of 7-7:30PM. Doing what? Endlessly chipping away at the rock that Sisyphus is pushing, presumably. Why? The excessive tricky daylight cunningly convinced me it wasn’t that late, but still… what’s the point? The sadness of my realization cannot be fathomed. I’m still here, no longer being paid, filling up the bucket of unearned labour for my employer because I do not have anywhere else to be.
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Tuesday, March 08, 2016

That Fresh Warm Cotton Feeling 


Image via Designspiration

One sunny winter morning I opened the blinds and laid out the clothes that I planned to wear. By the time I had finished my shower my jeans had been soaking up the warmth of the morning light like a cat asleep in a sunbeam. Putting on warm pants is such a fantastic feeling it’s like being cloaked in a full body hug. That cozy sensation was exactly what it felt like when I held my fully functioning and recently repaired phone in my trembling hand. The shock of my joy left me sort of stunned then surprised at my relief.

Saturday evening, a brief moment of clumsiness had disabled my phone. It only has four buttons, but now the most important one and the touch screen were unresponsive making it slightly less useful than a paperweight. Who uses paperweights anyway? Perhaps playwrights who compose scripts on some windswept park bench or something.

Keep in mind that a phone is no longer a phone. It’s a very powerful, compact and expensive computer (though not as expensive as other computers) that happens to make phone calls. Like anyone with a smart phone, I use my phone to take photos and videos, check the weather, send e-mails and texts, read books and news, organize my work calendar, track my exercise, listen to music and even to change channels on my TV. Needless to say it’s pretty important. I’m not even the kind of person who is that absorbed by their phone. I often forget it at my desk at work or after putting it in privacy mode at the movies will forget to turn it back on until the next day. Yet without it, I felt abandoned and isolated. I desperately tried putting my SIM card into two older phones (which work fine by the way) only to find they weren't supported by my network, thus were almost as useless as my busted phone. Read more »

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Monday, October 26, 2015

8-Bit 80s 

Don't ask why I was listening to this from work but it was required research. It immediately lifted my spirits. I don't really look back at the 1980s with any kind of Happy Days nostalgiarrhea but man, this collection of 8-bit 80s covers is more 80s than a Reagan - Thatcher - Pope John Paul II threeway (um, I mean political summit). By the way, if listening to this doesn't cheer you up even a little bit, then you are un-cheer-upable!



Enjoy it or hate it, but don't DENY IT!

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Thursday, March 12, 2015

My Very Well Explained Dislike of Instagram 



I think I’ve been using the Instagram mobile app long enough to articulate some very basic problems with the experience. I’m also currently be nagged to re-up my Flickr Pro account in a time when you have to ask, “Do you need a Flickr Pro account in 2015?” I’m starting to think you do, especially given the following reasons that Instagram is, for me, Instabad. Read more »

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Tuesday, March 03, 2015

Unbearable Wearables

Steve Mann's early wearable computer prototype

In this episode of the NPR podcast Invisibilia, the hosts interview early wearables creators from MIT’s media lab and ask if technology is changing us. Of course, those super-nerds believe that wearing reality-augmenting tech like Google Glass only helps us be better versions of ourselves and don’t understand why people would question one form of technology over another, like say, eye glasses or shoes.

Here I got a little angry. The very pleasant hosts and creators of Invisibilia are not about challenging their interviewees as much as continuing a conversation. So I’ll challenge them instead. There is a vast and profound difference between Internet connected technology and technology that is clothing. The conversation continues that Plato argued against writing the way we do about mobile phones today, except Plato’s speculations, while somewhat true, have failed to end civilization the way fears around mobile phones are still forming.

Technology obviously changes us. Sometimes for better, sometimes for worse. At its worse, technology does break connections to other people (those in the room as opposed to strangers on the other side of the planet). It affects our “presence”. When drivers use their mobile devices, they aren’t distracted as much by pretty colours as they are by speaking to someone while they are driving. The driver’s brain is doing too much work imagining the speaker on the other end of the call to be present enough to drive a car. Drivers not on the mobile phones are encased in a bubble of glass, steel and plastic and as such are disconnected from people walking on the street. Drivers stop seeing pedestrians as vulnerable people, but more as objects through a screen on the road (if they see pedestrians at all). I think people drive worse when their windows are up because they are completely and physically separated from the world outside the vehicle. Have you ever talked to someone who keeps both earbuds in while they talk to you? Are they listening to you, or to another caller or to a song? Are they present at all or are they in their own audio bubble? Talking to someone tapping out a message on a mobile phone or laptop is equalling disconcerting. I’ve not spoken to someone reading their e-mail on Google Glass but my guess is why bother? They aren’t really there anyway. They are in another space of textual communication rather than a verbal one. Their nonverbal cues point to their focus being elsewhere.

Technology sometimes makes us break social interaction and nonverbal communication. This isn’t too dissimilar from someone with Asberger Syndrome. It's not hard to imagine that the scientists of MIT or early adopters of Google Glass were never really that good at social interaction or nonverbal communication to begin with. The reason someone coined the term “Glasshole” is because the wearer of the technology was too distracted to know they were being a-holes to begin with.

As designers we often aspire to be technology optimists, but in the area of wearables we should keep in mind not just the experience of the person using the technology but also the experience of others interacting with the wearer. It may take time for wearable etiquette to form but that doesn’t excuse us from ignoring it.

It’s a little like smoking. If you smoke, I don’t really care if your habit is killing you, just don’t take me down with you. E-cigarettes or “vaping” on the other hand may turn out to be even less healthy than smoking (hard to believe) but, so far, it seems to be pretty benign to bystanders. Google Glass will eventually be invaluable to professional users such as pilots, surgeons, forklift drivers, or film directors but because it draws attention of the eye, thus the gaze of the user stares nowhere in particular, it will always be intrusive to face-to-face conversation (oh, sorry, “F2F interaction”).


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Friday, September 26, 2014

Dark Sky 

I'm pretty sure this is the nicest weather embed widget I've seen. It's from the creators of Dark Sky, one of the nicest weather iPhone apps you'll see. Unfortunately, it isn't available in the Canadian App Store so this will have to do for now.


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Wednesday, June 25, 2014

A New Dog Can Learn Old Tricks 

image of Best Buy Store
image via Daily Finance
“I entered what is sort of surprising in downtown Toronto — essentially a suburban sized big-box store”
I had decided a quick fix to my current need for radios in both the bedroom and the kitchen was to purchase a single modest speaker that could connect via Bluetooth to my phone/laptop/tablet. I did some cursory research and found 3 or 4 options, all apparently in stock according to the BestBuy Web site at a store located on my route home.

Now, I could’ve just ordered one of these little speakers via Amazon or BestBuy, but I thought why wait 2-3 weeks for delivery when I could walk into a well stocked store and walk out minutes later with an item I could test and see in person. BestBuy even offers a way to order an item you want that may be out of stock and have it delivered to the store of your choice, but that could take 24-48 hours and I wanted this thing now, not later. It’s the whole reason for a bricks-and-mortar store, right? The immediacy and ease of the shopping experience was only minutes away. Right? No, not right.
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Friday, May 02, 2014

You Will Be Amazed 


I am not a salesman. I am not an entrepreneur. I am not a closer or a finisher. I am however a conversationalist. Give me a chance and I'll talk your ear off. I'm a good wingman. I'll be your Yves Tanguay. I'll set you up and never take the shot for myself. In fact, I'm so averse to taking the shot I don't even recognize when it's mine to take. Unfortunately, I'm spending three days surrounded by shooters and it feels a little like being a seal who has just cut himself shaving while swimming in shark infested waters. Uncomfortable.

I'm not sure why I lack that killer instinct. I just get queasy about it. Even as I do these demos for an application I helped create I still want to make self deprecating jokes or if the questions veer away from the script I don't know how to get back into the demo except for an awkward non sequitur (“…so anyway…”). I'm not naturally obsequious. At least I hope I'm not. Maybe that's part of the problem. Not only am I not that guy, I don't even want to pretend to be that guy. Not even for a bit.

Thus I take it as a minor victory to get through the last three days and long periods of standing and waiting only to be interupted by bursts of launching into a pitch about something that will “amaze and astound you!” For the most part these on-the-floor demos have worked out well, with the occasional glitches you might expect for some demo software running 7-8 hours at a time and being put through its paces dozens of times.

The worst of it is just the standing around on your guard waiting to be approached. There were plenty of questions I couldn’t answer but I’d have to say really only one or two people who were distracted or disinterested and only one who just “didn’t get it”. The eloquent seven minute presentation that told the fairy book story of our path of discovery was often just cut to a three minute elevator pitch. I’m definitely not like these people who look like they have never worn anything other than a suit and tie. Their large wristwatches are paired with firm handshakes and jocular winks. What surprised me most of all was how so many of these guys looked and acted more like car salesmen. I don’t think any of the technology or design mattered at all. They’d sell water to fish if they had the chance. I suppose I thought technology was a little different in at least some aspects but that bubble has burst and that ship sailed. Which is what aggravates me most of all. Is this the reason why you see the products you see in stores or offered online? Because one goof in a suit sold some crap to another puffed up self-important goof in a suit? These aren’t “product-oriented” people. They are sales oriented.

In many ways, I am their absolute opposite. It’s hard to get interested in what a cable company might want. They want to squelch Net Neutrality. They want to rent you a piece of hardware for $10 a month that’s not worth a fraction of that compared to the high end device you make phone calls or send text messages on. They want to bundle lousy content with the best content to move product off the shelves. On the other hand, I’m an advocate for the user. I want to make your life easier, not more convoluted or full of obstacles. I’m here to help – you would be amazed how hard that is to sell.

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Friday, March 08, 2013

Long Live the Short-lived Thing

In a discussion this morning the topic became about how explosive the "Harlem Shake" video meme has been. From an army brigade being punished for their post to an austere, minimalist software interpretation, just as this lastest Internet thing looks like it's burning out, a new version emerges. There are now so many on Youtube, it's hard to choose just one (but I did - because it follows the formula so faithfully). Fader magazine traced the story of the track and first video but Google's Trend generator do-hickey really shows it in context. Long live the Internet Meme. The Internet Meme is dead.

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