Thursday, December 24, 2020

Like the Ones I Used to Know 

I’m passed the age of dreaming of snow for Christmas or presents under the tree or chocolates in a sock (OK, if I find a sock full of chocolates, it would probably cheer me up. C’mon… chocolate!) but I’ll never be passed the age of missing family. So many people are lamenting not being able to be with family for Christmas this year but I’m sure a few are more than happy not to deal with the stress of travel, the expense and stress of gift giving or the inevitable drunken Uncle Phil with a less than modern view of race relations and gender fluidity (“Fluids?! Don’t mention fluids at the dinner table!”)

Last year, I voluntarily removed all the stress of the holidays by staying at home alone. I spent Christmas Eve and Christmas Day entirely alone. In my solitude I slept, ate, watched TV and movies, snacked and napped my way into a state of bliss. Of course, this was possibly one of the loveliest holidays ever because I was still able to see friends, visit galleries and I wasn’t really missing family as I had spent a lovely summer vacation with them when Newfoundland is at its best (“When summer spreads her hand” as the Ode to Newfoundland says).

This year is different. I won’t be spending the holidays alone, but I won’t be with family either. Now, almost a year and half since seeing family, including my ailing mother, and there is a bitter tang to this pandemic pill. (Pill? Is there a pill?! No, Uncle Phil, go back to sleep.) We can never seemingly get what we truly desire, unless you live in a Hallmark Christmas movie, which is to have everyone we love be together at the same place, at the same time, and still have control of the television remote. So pardon my nostalgia, back to a time when I was so small that my world was so small that everyone I loved fit on a single couch and could squeeze into a single photo. My world is bigger now but I still want that feeling. Hopefully, a slice of marzipan covered pound cake, a chocolate (or two), an old tune and some familiar voices will do just that.

Merry Christmas everyone.