The Merry Month of May

There’s a lot of birthdays this month. My oldest brother, his youngest son, and his oldest grandchild all have birthdays in May (yes, it does freak me out a little to refer to a brother having grandchildren). Three generations. It always gets me thinking of that A.C. Newman song “There Are Maybe Ten or Twelve…”.

“There are maybe ten or twelve things I could teach you. After that, well, I think you're on your own.”

This is something I often think about. What advice can I pass on to the younger generation? What do I know? Not much. But I know some things. 

1. You can remove oil stains on your clothing with a sprinkle of talcum or corn starch.
2. Less haste, more speed, or “Festina lente” in Latin. In fact, it was something my mother would always say when flubbing a small chore she was doing.
3. Moisturize. I'm just a man embracing the reality that his skin is a large organ in need of maintenance.
4. A drunken man’s words are the sober man’s thoughts, or “in vino veritas” in Latin (thank you, Pliny the Elder).
5. ABC - Always Be Cleaning. If you are always tidying up and cleaning up a little bit, then you’re never really having to clean a lot.
6. Never say, “I told you so” (well, at least not to someone you love).
7. Use it or lose it. Whether it’s your body, your strength, your words, your flexibility, or your love. If you let something atrophy, it is very hard to get back.
8. If you want French fries, get your own fries. 

There. I made it to eight. That's four more things than I used to know, but fewer than A.C. Newman knew in that song. Knowing a couple of Latin phrases is handy because it makes such wisdom sound smarter (and I didn't hear Newman use any Latin). These may not change your life, but they are deep and eternal truths. At a time when truth is at such a premium, pay attention to the truths that have lasted a long time. If you’re only ten, then keep in mind I’ve lived more than five of your lifetimes, so pay attention. Being older doesn't make me smarter; it makes me wiser. That's what "being wiser" means: having had enough time to screw up again and again, and make note of where you went wrong. Oh, I have one more:
9. You don't write notes to remember something later; you do it to remember it now.